YOU MIGHT BE A WISCONSINITE IF...

* You define Summer as three months of bad sledding.

* Your definition of a small town is one that only has one bar.

* Snow tires come standard on all your cars.

* You refer to the Packers as "we."

* At least 50% of your relatives work on a dairy farm.

* You can make sense out of the words upnort and Trivers.

* You have ever gotten frostbitten and sunburned in the same week.

* You can identify a Michigan accent.

* You know what "cow-tipping" is.

* You learned to drive a tractor before the training wheels were off your bike.

* "Down South" to you means Chicago.

* Traveling coast to coast means going from Superior to Milwaukee.

* The "Big Three" means Miller, Old Milwaukee & PBR.

* A brat is something you eat.

* You were offended by the movie "Fargo."

* You know that Eau Claire is not something you eat.

* You have no problem spelling Milwaukee.

* You consider Madison "exotic."

* You got a passport to go to Minnesota.

* Your idea of foreign culture is listening to Da Yoopers.

* You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

* You've seen a hodag.

* You used to think Deer Season was included as an official school holiday.

* You know that Gotham is a real city.

* You can actually pronounce and spell Oconomowoc.

* You know what a bubbler is.

* The snow on your roof in August weighs more than you do.

* Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow next to your bluespruce.

* You think there should be a "FIB go home" bumper sticker on every car north of Madison.

* Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.

* A Friday night out is taking your girlfriend shining for deer.

* You go out for fish fry on every Friday.

* You go to work in a snowsuit in the morning and return home wearing shorts.

* When you tell someone where you are from and they say: 'I thought that was part of Canada.'

* Bernie Brewer is your idol because he gets to dive in a giant beer mug.

* Your idea of the seasons is Winter, Spring and the 4th of July.

* You know how to polka.

* Your idea of diversity is having black, white, and brown cows.

* You drink "soda" and refer to your dad as "pop."

* Formal wear is a flannel shirt, blue jeans and a baseball cap.

* You tried to tap the "World's Largest Six Pack."

* Your children describe their summer vacation out of state as a "trip to Door County."

* You are unaware there is a legal drinking age.

* You have to go to Florida to get a tan in August.

* You have caught a fish in Lake Michigan and it glowed in the dark.

* You define "swimming season" as Labor Day weekend.

* Your 4th of July Family Picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

* You know where the city of Waunakee is AND can pronounce it.

* You can visit Luxemburg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, and Poland all in one afternoon.

* You have more fishing poles than teeth...

* You decided to have a picnic this summer because it fell on a weekend.

* You have been involved in a "drive-by hay bailing."