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| YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN WHEN...
* The "road hog" in front of you on Main Street is a farmer's combine. * The local phone book has only one yellow page. * Third Street is on the edge of town. * You leave your jacket on the back of the chair in the cafe, and when you go back the next day, it's still there, on the same chair. * You don't signal turns because everyone knows where you're going, anyway. * No social events can be scheduled when the school gym floor is being varnished. * You call a wrong number and they supply you with the correct one. * Everyone knows all the news before it's published; they just read the hometown paper to see whether the publisher got it right. * The city limits signs are both on the same post! * The City jail is called amoeba, because it only has one cell. * The McDonalds only has one Golden Arch. * The 7-11 is a 3 1/2 - 5 1/2. * The one-block-long Main Street dead ends in both directions. * The phone book has only one page. * There's nothing doing every minute. * The ZIP code is a fraction. * Second Street is in the next town over. * There's no place to go that you shouldn't. * A "Night on the Town" takes only 11 minutes. * The mayor had to annex property to eat a foot-long hot dog. * The New Year's baby was born in October.
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