|
| MEDICAL TRUTHS
- The patient furthest away from the nurses' station rings the call bell more often than the patient nearest to the nurses' station. - You always remember "just one more thing" you need after you've gowned, gloved, and masked and gone into that isolation room. - The correct depth of compression in adult CPR is a bit less than the depth you just reached when you broke those ribs. - When you cancel extra staff because it's so quiet, you are guaranteed a rash of admissions. - If you wear a new white uniform, expect to be thrown up on. Corollary: Residents always poop on your brand new shoes. - There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work. - When management smiles at you, be afraid, very afraid ... - Staffing will gladly send you three aides--but you have to float two of your RNs. - As soon as you discontinue the IV line, more fluids will be ordered. - Mandatory meetings are always scheduled after you've had the night from hell and just want to go home to bed. - You always forget what it was you wanted after you get to the supply room. You always remember when you get back to the other end ... - Doctors only ask your name when the patient isn't doing well. - Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the boss is watching. - The more sophisticated the equipment, the longer it takes to get repaired. - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. - As soon as you've ordered the pizzas, 25 patients show up at the ER registration desk along with three ambulances all with cardiac arrests!
|
|
|
|
Brought to you by Unwind.com
|
