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| I DON'T WANT TO BE A DOCTOR BECAUSE...
If I were a pathologist I'd be in a dead end job. If I were a biologist I'd be in jeans all the time. Anesthesiology would put me to sleep. Cell specialists are too cultured for my taste. I can't stand podiatry. I can't see myself as an ophthalmologist. I'm too old to be a gerontologist. I would have to be crazy to become a psychiatrist. But a friend told me that ontology would grow on me. I'm told pediatrics is child's play! I haven't got the heart to be a cardiologist. And they'd see right through me if I went into radiology. And I really couldn't face it if I were a dermatologist. I haven't got the spine to be a chiropractor. I'm not cut out to be a surgeon. If I weren't such a baby, I'd become a gynecologist. It's been drilled into me that I should be a dentist. I'd rather be a plumber than a urologist. If I were a proctologist, I'd have to look at assholes all day.
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