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| SIGNS YOU MAY BE SUFFERING FROM DEPRESSION
* You've got enough Prozac in your purse to tranquilize King Kong. * You really lose it whenever someone says, "Good morning." * You spend more time in bed than a hooker at a Shriners convention. * You keep your house so dark that mushrooms are growing in the carpet. * Given a choice, you'd have no preference between sex or a root canal. * On a really bad day, you wouldn't come to the door if it was Publishers Clearing House. * You list Dr. Kevorkian as a character reference. * Alcohol gives you strength and food settles your nerves. * Your hands shake so badly that you can brush your teeth without any voluntary movement. * You've cried so much that your contacts have rusted to your eyeballs.
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